204483 Resource 187006 187132 187132 1211240862032 1211242738930 Controlled Women “take care�? Men “take charge�?: Can this be strength not a curse?

Woman in Leadership Symposium Speech, February, 2008

As a social psychologist disguised as a business owner, I like to examine the world through scientific and social lenses.  So today I will share some personal experiences and share some scientific studies that inform how women can be more powerful. Women are stepping into more positions of power and their positive impact is being acknowledged. A 2007 Catalyst study reported that corporations with more women on their boards are significantly better financial performers: 53% more return on equity and greater returns on sales. Women are also starting more businesses than men. In the US, women are starting businesses at twice the rate of men. In fact, there are over 7 million women-owned businesses in the US, accounting for over $950 billion. I think there are many reasons this occurs. One is clearly the way in which we work is different. I want to highlight the important differences and suggest ways we can use those differences to our advantage.The women’s movement in the US earned us much freedom and access. Now the question is, “What will we use that power for?”  We have to be determined to use that power to make a better world.  There is no need for us to become like men.  Our differences are real and valuable.  Let us celebrate those and allow them to empower us to make change. In 2006, I was fortunate to attend and speak at a conference of women leaders in Shanghai, China. At the conference, I watched as women interacted and except for the language, I saw the same networking concerns for appearance and communication patterns I see in the U.S. at a <a title="NAWBO Website" href="www.nawbola.org/" target="_blank">NAWBO</a> (National Association of Women Business Owners) event.  Amazing – in so many ways we are more alike than we are different.As women we need to know the differences and strategically use them or not. As women we excel at 4 things: <ol><li>consensus building </li><li>relationship building</li><li>intuitive thinking</li><li>multi-tasking</li></ol>These are important leadership skills.  Recent research indicates that many of these skills are derived from real differences in how our brains work and they certainly affect how we communicate.One of the women on the <a title="WLB's Website" href="www.hkswomensleadershipboard.org" target="_blank">Harvard Kennedy School Women’s Leadership Board</a>, Barbara Annis, has written a wonderful book that elucidates these differences, <a title="Click to buy Samer Words, Different Languages" href="http://www.amazon.com/Same-Words-Different-Language-Misunderstand/dp/0749924640" target="_blank">Same Words, Different Languages</a>.  I highly recommend it. Published in 30 languages, it crosses borders and cultures.Some of the brain differences that she reports include the fact that women’s brains have a much higher developed corpus callosum, the neurons which connect our two hemispheres, so we think with both sides of our brains. We also have 40% more neuron firings and they occur in the emotional areas of the brain – So women are more emotional than men.Advanced imaging of the brain using MRI’s indicate that we store memory in more parts of our brains – we notice details and make connections to the past. This also means we see connections and implications that others may not see. What does this all mean – ? <ul><li>Women bond in conversations --- Men bond in games and tasks.</li></ul><ul><li>Women are multi-taskers and switch topics in conversation --- Men are linear thinkers, one problem a time</li></ul><ul><li>Women share problems when they want to talk about them --- Men share only when they want them fixed</li></ul><ul><li>Women explore every detail before concluding ---Men usually want to get straight to the point</li></ul><ul><li>Women first see a problem as “their” problem --- Men first see a problem as someone else’s</li></ul><a title="Bio for Barbara Annis" href="www.baainc.com/bio-barbara-annis.htm" target="_blank">Barbara Annis</a>  a communications consultant who has studied over 1 million business people in 30 countries, has  identified the role these gender differences play I other cultures. Gender differences cross cultures and are stronger in some.  In a large study among Chinese, Japanese and Korean business people conducted for an apparel company they saw large differences in how men and women view their work.  I would like to share 3 of them with you. I suspect you have experienced this yourself.<ol><li>First was that of Chang Kai Chek in China: Doesn’t matter if it is black or white, whichever gets the mouse. True to that – the men were concerned about results only.  In China and the other Asian countries the women were more concerned about the journey. </li><li>Another finding: The women felt that if they worked long and hard they would be recognized. What that really means is we become marginalized and dispensable. Why elevate her?  She is doing the job she needs to do for him just where she is.</li><li>And lastly: The junior women felt the senior women were harder on the junior women than on the men – the queen bee syndrome – “I paid my dues, so you can to”.  This does not seem much different than what we have experienced in the US.  I hope they can benefit from our learning and leap ahead.</li></ol>As women we do care about the journey, it matters whether the cat is white or black, because it will mean different ways of living and it will make a difference for future generations. As women ascend to leadership roles and the true added value of women’s leadership is seen and felt, our companies change and our government can change. But we as leaders need to emphasize our strengths. We don’t need to become that third gender – a tough woman using command and control techniques. We can use the consensus building to make change occur and empower others to embrace the differences.Do Women Hurt Other Woman in Power? Yes, we do. The differences I spoke of a moment ago also feed into stereotypes of behavior. We have descriptive gender stereotypes that describe the way men and women are – women are nurturing, men are aggressive, women are supportive and drive consensus, men dictate and control, etc. We create those – they are value laden. We also have prescriptive norms delineating what we should be like. Men should be “agentic” (independent, assertive, decisive): women should be “communal” (unselfish, caring, and concerned with others).Similarly there are prescriptive behaviors for people of certain religions, races, etc.People who violate prescriptive norms are in trouble. Negative reactions for prescriptive gender norm violations are especially debilitating for women in the workplace because the behaviors “less acceptable” for women are often the ones required for success – being agentive.For example, how many of you have had to compete with men for a very important job interview?Do you engage with pride in a long diatribe abut your accomplishments? Is that self-promotion or is that bragging? That may depend on the interviewer’s perceptions.Recent research demonstrates that women still have low expectations about their potential to succeed in male-typed jobs. (JPSP, February 2008, Parks-Stamm.Hellman.Hearns) A study conducted in 2007 at NYU asked men and women to react to a woman job applicant for a VP of Financial Affairs at a corporation.  In all cases the respondents were shown a long reference letter summarizing the woman’s qualifications with years of experience, unrivaled hard work, etc.  After reading the letter respondents filled out a one-page questionnaire on the woman, a questionnaire rating the writing style and a questionnaire on their communication style. This last questionnaire actually measured perceptions of them.The letter was the same except for one last section. It included a description of her as “even-handed in her treatment of others, emphasizing the importance of having a challenging work environment and commended for her efforts to promote performance excellence.   The other group had the exact same letter but it ended with a description of the candidate as someone who is understanding and concerned about others, emphasizes the importance of having a supportive work environment and has been commended for her efforts to promote a sense of belonging within her department. So one ended with “appropriate women’s qualities” and the other did not. Men and women responded and rated her. What do you think happened?  The competency ratings were the same across the two descriptions. But, men and women liked her less and saw her as higher in interpersonal hostility when the neutral/male characteristics were used. Clearly they thought she must be tough to get that far.After reading the statements how did people see themselves? The men saw themselves as equally competent no matter which version they read. But the women saw themselves as less competent when the woman showed gender appropriate characteristics.When female respondents view successful women as a threat to the self; when able to characterize her as a norm violator, she is dropped as a standard of comparison, and the women are able to salvage their own self-views. “The only reason she is successful is because she is a ‘ball-buster’. I don’t want to be like her”. We need to be careful – these are successful women – doing what they need to do to succeed. We should not sabotage our own.These experimenters conducted a similar study and this before they evaluated anything else. Some of the respondents were told they had low skills for managing and others were told they were high on this dimension. These respondents were also asked   to rate the woman applicant. Sadly, the females rated her even lower when they had been given negative feedback. It seems they needed to maintain a positive view of themselves so they derogate the other. High performing women often face derogation by other women merely because they represent a threatening upward social comparison.  Sadly, these reactions to successful women serve to maintain the very norms that restrict individual success for all women. We need women to succeed in many ways – some using their corpus callosum, their nurturing, consensus building ways and some being the independent agent.I believe most successful women have blended their male and female selves. We have to be careful that we do not judge others by any prescriptive standards. We should not be queen bees. Let other women fill roles of importance – look for ways to open doors for other women. Every week at the end of the week ask ourselves, “have I helped another woman advance?”  Women, with the help of men, can and will change the world. Women are rising to power.  As that balance of power occurs, the world improves. We need to stay true to our differences and let those shine through. As women we have found our differences to be our added value – our strength. Do what you feel in your heart to be right for you'll be criticized anyway. "You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't." Eleanor Roosevelt. 10 application/xml Barbara Annis Different Languages Fraser Communications Harvard Kennedy School National Association of Women Business Owners NAWBO Renee White Fraser Ph.D. Same Words WLB Woman in Leadership Symposium Women's Leadership Board false Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 7.0; Windows NT 5.1; .NET CLR 1.1.4322) 127.0.0.1 127.0.0.1 reneefraser 205.147.59.193 false true false false true 187283 false false true false false false true 187006 blog blogsite/ReneeFraser/web